{"title":"Low-Stakes Chaos","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003eNobody's getting hurt, but someone's definitely uncomfortable. The Low-Stakes Chaos collection from Milk Sandwich is funny graphic tees for people who cause problems gently. Soft cotton, original designs, $30.\u003c\/p\u003e","products":[{"product_id":"not-today-satan-unisex-t-shirt","title":"Not Today Satan T-shirt","description":"\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eNot Today Satan (But Friday Looks Open). The boundary with a loophole. This is the shirt for every morning you open your inbox and immediately close your laptop. For every meeting that should have been an email. For every moment the universe tests your patience and you say no thanks... but you're not ruling anything out for the weekend.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eThe Not Today Satan t-shirt from Milk Sandwich puts your boundary... setting energy on full display while quietly admitting you're negotiable. Bold graphic lettering on soft cotton that lets the world know you are not accepting applications for drama today. Or tomorrow. Maybe next week. But Friday? Friday's looking wide open.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eWho is this for? Anyone who has ever said \"absolutely not\" and then followed up with \"...unless.\" Teachers, nurses, parents, retail workers, and every single person who has had to smile through something they absolutely did not sign up for but will probably agree to again by end of week. It also makes a perfect gift for the friend who has zero patience and even less follow-through on their own boundaries.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Milk Sandwich","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ XS \/ Adults","offer_id":46740057129264,"sku":"4481623_9527","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S \/ Adults","offer_id":46740057162032,"sku":"4481623_4016","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M \/ Adults","offer_id":46740057194800,"sku":"4481623_4017","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L \/ Adults","offer_id":46740057227568,"sku":"4481623_4018","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL \/ Adults","offer_id":46740057260336,"sku":"4481623_4019","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL \/ Adults","offer_id":46740057293104,"sku":"4481623_4020","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL \/ Adults","offer_id":46740057325872,"sku":"4481623_5295","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Maroon \/ XS \/ Adults","offer_id":46740057719088,"sku":"4481623_9545","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Maroon \/ S \/ Adults","offer_id":46740057751856,"sku":"4481623_4106","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Maroon \/ M \/ Adults","offer_id":46740057784624,"sku":"4481623_4107","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Maroon \/ L \/ Adults","offer_id":46740057817392,"sku":"4481623_4108","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Maroon \/ XL \/ Adults","offer_id":46740057850160,"sku":"4481623_4109","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Maroon \/ 2XL \/ Adults","offer_id":46740057882928,"sku":"4481623_4110","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Maroon \/ 3XL \/ Adults","offer_id":46740057915696,"sku":"4481623_15792","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ XS \/ Adults","offer_id":46740057424176,"sku":"4481623_9546","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ S \/ Adults","offer_id":46740057456944,"sku":"4481623_4111","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ M \/ Adults","offer_id":46740057489712,"sku":"4481623_4112","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ L \/ Adults","offer_id":46740057522480,"sku":"4481623_4113","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ XL \/ Adults","offer_id":46740057555248,"sku":"4481623_4114","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 2XL \/ Adults","offer_id":46740057588016,"sku":"4481623_4115","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 3XL \/ Adults","offer_id":46740057620784,"sku":"4481623_12874","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pink \/ S \/ Adults","offer_id":46740058571056,"sku":"4481623_4136","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pink \/ M \/ Adults","offer_id":46740058603824,"sku":"4481623_4137","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pink \/ L \/ Adults","offer_id":46740058636592,"sku":"4481623_4138","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pink \/ XL \/ Adults","offer_id":46740058669360,"sku":"4481623_4139","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pink \/ 2XL \/ Adults","offer_id":46740058702128,"sku":"4481623_4140","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pink \/ 3XL \/ Adults","offer_id":46740058734896,"sku":"4481623_5303","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Prism Dusty Blue \/ XS \/ Adults","offer_id":46740058308912,"sku":"4481623_9580","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Prism Dusty Blue \/ S \/ Adults","offer_id":46740058341680,"sku":"4481623_9388","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Prism Dusty Blue \/ M \/ Adults","offer_id":46740058374448,"sku":"4481623_9389","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Prism Dusty Blue \/ L \/ Adults","offer_id":46740058407216,"sku":"4481623_9390","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Prism Dusty Blue \/ XL \/ Adults","offer_id":46740058439984,"sku":"4481623_9391","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Prism Dusty Blue \/ 2XL \/ Adults","offer_id":46740058472752,"sku":"4481623_9392","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Prism Dusty Blue \/ 3XL \/ Adults","offer_id":46740058505520,"sku":"4481623_9393","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/9570\/5904\/files\/Not-Today-Satan-Unisex-T-shirt_Color-Black_milk_sandwich.png?v=1751418569"},{"product_id":"bruh-unisex-t-shirt","title":"Bruh T-shirt","description":"\u003cp\u003eOne word. That is it. That is the whole shirt. \u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"p1\"\u003eBruh is what you say when there are no longer enough functioning thoughts to build a full sentence. It covers disappointment, disbelief, secondhand embarrassment, mild betrayal, major betrayal, and the kind of nonsense that makes you stare at the wall for a second.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"p1\"\u003eThat’s what makes this shirt work. It takes the most overworked, underappreciated word in modern conversation and gives it the respect it deserves. Clean, blunt, and already emotionally exhausted.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"p1\"\u003eThis graphic tee is for people who have seen too much, text “bruh” on instinct, and know that sometimes one word does a better job than an entire paragraph. A funny minimalist statement tee for everyday wear, and an easy gift for the friend, sibling, coworker, or chronically online person whose whole personality briefly disappears every time life does something unnecessary.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"p1\"\u003eBruh. That’s it. That’s the pitch.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Milk Sandwich","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ XS \/ Adults","offer_id":47062011871536,"sku":"5532443_9527","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S \/ Adults","offer_id":47062011904304,"sku":"5532443_4016","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M \/ Adults","offer_id":47062011937072,"sku":"5532443_4017","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L \/ Adults","offer_id":47062011969840,"sku":"5532443_4018","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47062012002608,"sku":"5532443_4019","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47062012035376,"sku":"5532443_4020","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47062012068144,"sku":"5532443_5295","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Leaf \/ S \/ Adults","offer_id":47062012625200,"sku":"5532443_4091","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Leaf \/ M \/ Adults","offer_id":47062012657968,"sku":"5532443_4092","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Leaf \/ L \/ Adults","offer_id":47062012690736,"sku":"5532443_4093","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Leaf \/ XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47062012723504,"sku":"5532443_4094","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Leaf \/ 2XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47062012756272,"sku":"5532443_4095","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Leaf \/ 3XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47062012789040,"sku":"5532443_5301","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Deep Teal \/ S \/ Adults","offer_id":47062012395824,"sku":"5532443_8481","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Deep Teal \/ M \/ Adults","offer_id":47062012428592,"sku":"5532443_8482","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Deep Teal \/ L \/ Adults","offer_id":47062012461360,"sku":"5532443_8483","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Deep Teal \/ XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47062012494128,"sku":"5532443_8484","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Deep Teal \/ 2XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47062012526896,"sku":"5532443_8485","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Deep Teal \/ 3XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47062012559664,"sku":"5532443_8486","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Raspberry \/ S \/ Adults","offer_id":47062012166448,"sku":"5532443_8523","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Raspberry \/ M \/ Adults","offer_id":47062012199216,"sku":"5532443_8524","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Raspberry \/ L \/ Adults","offer_id":47062012231984,"sku":"5532443_8525","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Raspberry \/ XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47062012264752,"sku":"5532443_8526","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Raspberry \/ 2XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47062012297520,"sku":"5532443_8527","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Raspberry \/ 3XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47062012330288,"sku":"5532443_8528","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Lilac \/ S \/ Adults","offer_id":47062013903152,"sku":"5532443_10368","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Lilac \/ M \/ Adults","offer_id":47062013935920,"sku":"5532443_10369","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Lilac \/ L \/ Adults","offer_id":47062013968688,"sku":"5532443_10370","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Lilac \/ XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47062014001456,"sku":"5532443_10371","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Lilac \/ 2XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47062014034224,"sku":"5532443_10372","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/9570\/5904\/files\/MILK_SANDWICH_BRUH_GREY_BG_MARKETING_IMAGE.png?v=1751500541"},{"product_id":"hold-my-coffee-unisex-t-shirt","title":"Hold My Coffee T-shirt","description":"\u003cp class=\"p1\"\u003ePolite first. Competitive immediately after.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"p1\"\u003eHold My Coffee is for the exact moment someone says something dismissive and accidentally activates your full operating system. Not rage. Not chaos. Just a very focused desire to prove a point while holding a beverage that suggests you’re actually quite pleasant.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"p1\"\u003eThat’s why this one works. The design looks sweet at first glance. Nice little coffee cup. Tiny heart. Warm, harmless energy. Then the second line comes in and the whole shirt reveals itself as a passive-aggressive mission statement. Cute, caffeinated, and absolutely not backing down.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"p1\"\u003eThis graphic tee is for people who run on coffee, spite, competence, and a strong internal monologue. The ones who don’t need to make a scene because outperforming you is already on the schedule. It fits coffee lovers, office overachievers, smartasses, quiet competitors, and anyone who’s ever turned doubt into fuel before 10 a.m.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"p1\"\u003eA funny statement tee, a solid gift for your most determined friend, and a very accurate shirt for anyone whose best work begins right after someone says, “I don’t think you can.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"p1\"\u003eSweet cup. Dangerous energy.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Milk Sandwich","offers":[{"title":"Black Heather \/ XS \/ Adults","offer_id":47132007432496,"sku":"9812963_9575","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black Heather \/ S \/ Adults","offer_id":47132007465264,"sku":"9812963_9577","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black Heather \/ M \/ Adults","offer_id":47132007498032,"sku":"9812963_9579","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black Heather \/ L \/ Adults","offer_id":47132007530800,"sku":"9812963_9581","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black Heather \/ XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47132007563568,"sku":"9812963_9583","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black Heather \/ 2XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47132007596336,"sku":"9812963_9585","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black Heather \/ 3XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47132007629104,"sku":"9812963_9587","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black Heather \/ 4XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47132007661872,"sku":"9812963_9589","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black Heather \/ 5XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47132007694640,"sku":"9812963_9591","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XS \/ Adults","offer_id":47132007727408,"sku":"9812963_9593","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S \/ Adults","offer_id":47132007760176,"sku":"9812963_9595","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M \/ Adults","offer_id":47132007792944,"sku":"9812963_9597","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L \/ Adults","offer_id":47132007825712,"sku":"9812963_9599","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47132007858480,"sku":"9812963_9601","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47132007891248,"sku":"9812963_9603","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47132007924016,"sku":"9812963_9605","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47132007956784,"sku":"9812963_9607","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 5XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47132007989552,"sku":"9812963_9609","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Midnight Navy \/ XS \/ Adults","offer_id":47132008022320,"sku":"9812963_9611","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Midnight Navy \/ S \/ Adults","offer_id":47132008055088,"sku":"9812963_9613","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Midnight Navy \/ M \/ Adults","offer_id":47132008087856,"sku":"9812963_9615","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Midnight Navy \/ L \/ Adults","offer_id":47132008120624,"sku":"9812963_9617","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Midnight Navy \/ XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47132008153392,"sku":"9812963_9619","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Midnight Navy \/ 2XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47132008186160,"sku":"9812963_9621","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Midnight Navy \/ 3XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47132008218928,"sku":"9812963_9623","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Midnight Navy \/ 4XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47132008251696,"sku":"9812963_9625","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Forest \/ S \/ Adults","offer_id":47132008284464,"sku":"9812963_9631","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Forest \/ M \/ Adults","offer_id":47132008317232,"sku":"9812963_9633","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Forest \/ L \/ Adults","offer_id":47132008350000,"sku":"9812963_9635","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Forest \/ XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47132008382768,"sku":"9812963_9637","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Forest \/ 2XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47132008415536,"sku":"9812963_9639","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Forest \/ 3XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47132008448304,"sku":"9812963_9641","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Forest \/ 4XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47132008481072,"sku":"9812963_9643","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Asphalt \/ S \/ Adults","offer_id":47132008513840,"sku":"9812963_9649","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Asphalt \/ M \/ Adults","offer_id":47132008546608,"sku":"9812963_9651","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Asphalt \/ L \/ Adults","offer_id":47132008579376,"sku":"9812963_9653","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Asphalt \/ XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47132008612144,"sku":"9812963_9655","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Asphalt \/ 2XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47132008644912,"sku":"9812963_9657","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Asphalt \/ 3XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47132008677680,"sku":"9812963_9659","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Asphalt \/ 4XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47132008710448,"sku":"9812963_9661","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Army \/ S \/ Adults","offer_id":47132008743216,"sku":"9812963_9667","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Army \/ M \/ Adults","offer_id":47132008775984,"sku":"9812963_9669","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Army \/ L \/ Adults","offer_id":47132008808752,"sku":"9812963_9671","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Army \/ XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47132008841520,"sku":"9812963_9673","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Army \/ 2XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47132008874288,"sku":"9812963_9675","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Army \/ 3XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47132008907056,"sku":"9812963_9677","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Army \/ 4XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47132008939824,"sku":"9812963_9679","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Deep Teal \/ S \/ Adults","offer_id":47132008972592,"sku":"9812963_9685","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Deep Teal \/ M \/ Adults","offer_id":47132009005360,"sku":"9812963_9687","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Deep Teal \/ L \/ Adults","offer_id":47132009038128,"sku":"9812963_9689","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Deep Teal \/ XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47132009070896,"sku":"9812963_9691","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Deep Teal \/ 2XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47132009103664,"sku":"9812963_9693","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Deep Teal \/ 3XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47132009136432,"sku":"9812963_9695","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Deep Teal \/ 4XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47132009169200,"sku":"9812963_9697","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather True Royal \/ S \/ Adults","offer_id":47132009201968,"sku":"9812963_9703","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather True Royal \/ M \/ Adults","offer_id":47132009234736,"sku":"9812963_9705","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather True Royal \/ L \/ Adults","offer_id":47132009267504,"sku":"9812963_9707","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather True Royal \/ XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47132009300272,"sku":"9812963_9709","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather True Royal \/ 2XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47132009333040,"sku":"9812963_9711","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather True Royal \/ 3XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47132009365808,"sku":"9812963_9713","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather True Royal \/ 4XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47132009398576,"sku":"9812963_9715","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Steel Blue \/ S \/ Adults","offer_id":47132009431344,"sku":"9812963_9721","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Steel Blue \/ M \/ Adults","offer_id":47132009464112,"sku":"9812963_9723","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Steel Blue \/ L \/ Adults","offer_id":47132009496880,"sku":"9812963_9725","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Steel Blue \/ XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47132009529648,"sku":"9812963_9727","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Steel Blue \/ 2XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47132009562416,"sku":"9812963_9729","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Steel Blue \/ 3XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47132009627952,"sku":"9812963_9731","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Steel Blue \/ 4XL \/ Adults","offer_id":47132009660720,"sku":"9812963_9733","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/9570\/5904\/files\/MILK_SANDWICH_HOLD_ON_MY_COFFEE_GREY_BG_MARKETING_IMAGE.png?v=1751500558"},{"product_id":"im-high-can-i-pet-your-dog-unisex-t-shirt","title":"I'm High, Can I Pet Your Dog T-shirt","description":"\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eThe question you're already thinking. The I'm High Can I Pet Your Dog tee from Milk Sandwich puts the quiet part loud and honestly, the dog appreciates the transparency.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eThis shirt is for every person who has ever crossed a street to meet a stranger's golden retriever. The one who asks \"what's their name\" before acknowledging the human on the other end of the leash. The friend who shows up to your house and spends the first twenty minutes on the floor with your dog while you stand there holding the door open like staff.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eWho is this for? Anyone whose ideal Saturday involves edibles and a dog park. The person who follows more dogs than people on Instagram and isn't embarrassed about it. The one who has said \"I'm a dog person\" as if it explains every life choice they've ever made. It's also the perfect gift for anyone whose love language is pets and whose second language is snacks.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Milk Sandwich","offers":[{"title":"Heather Prism Lilac \/ XS \/ Adults","offer_id":49185150697776,"sku":"7754376_9578","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Prism Lilac \/ S \/ Adults","offer_id":49185150730544,"sku":"7754376_9580","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Prism Lilac \/ M \/ Adults","offer_id":49185150763312,"sku":"7754376_9582","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Prism Lilac \/ L \/ Adults","offer_id":49185150796080,"sku":"7754376_9584","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Prism Lilac \/ XL \/ Adults","offer_id":49185150828848,"sku":"7754376_9586","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Prism Lilac \/ 2XL \/ Adults","offer_id":49185150861616,"sku":"7754376_9588","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ocean Blue \/ S \/ Adults","offer_id":49185150927152,"sku":"7754376_9592","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ocean Blue \/ M \/ Adults","offer_id":49185150959920,"sku":"7754376_9594","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ocean Blue \/ L \/ Adults","offer_id":49185150992688,"sku":"7754376_9596","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ocean Blue \/ XL \/ Adults","offer_id":49185151025456,"sku":"7754376_9598","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ocean Blue \/ 2XL \/ Adults","offer_id":49185151058224,"sku":"7754376_9600","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Dust \/ S \/ Adults","offer_id":49185151123760,"sku":"7754376_9604","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Dust \/ M \/ Adults","offer_id":49185151156528,"sku":"7754376_9606","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Dust \/ L \/ Adults","offer_id":49185151189296,"sku":"7754376_9608","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Dust \/ XL \/ Adults","offer_id":49185151222064,"sku":"7754376_9610","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Dust \/ 2XL \/ Adults","offer_id":49185151254832,"sku":"7754376_9612","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Prism Ice Blue \/ XS \/ Adults","offer_id":49185151287600,"sku":"7754376_9614","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Prism Ice Blue \/ S \/ Adults","offer_id":49185151320368,"sku":"7754376_9616","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Prism Ice Blue \/ M \/ Adults","offer_id":49185151353136,"sku":"7754376_9618","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Prism Ice Blue \/ L \/ Adults","offer_id":49185151385904,"sku":"7754376_9620","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Prism Ice Blue \/ XL \/ Adults","offer_id":49185151418672,"sku":"7754376_9622","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Prism Ice Blue \/ 2XL \/ Adults","offer_id":49185151451440,"sku":"7754376_9624","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Citron \/ XS \/ Adults","offer_id":49185151516976,"sku":"7754376_9626","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false},{"title":"Citron \/ S \/ Adults","offer_id":49185151549744,"sku":"7754376_9628","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false},{"title":"Citron \/ M \/ Adults","offer_id":49185151582512,"sku":"7754376_9630","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false},{"title":"Citron \/ L \/ Adults","offer_id":49185151615280,"sku":"7754376_9632","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false},{"title":"Citron \/ XL \/ Adults","offer_id":49185151648048,"sku":"7754376_9634","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false},{"title":"Citron \/ 2XL \/ Adults","offer_id":49185151680816,"sku":"7754376_9636","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/9570\/5904\/files\/MILK_SANDWICH_IM_HIGH_CAN_I_PET_YOUR_DOG_1_GREY_BG_MARKETING_IMAGE.png?v=1751500504"},{"product_id":"i-absorbed-my-twin-whats-your-superpower-unisex-t-shirt","title":"I Absorbed My Twin T-shirt","description":"\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eThe I Absorbed My Twin tee is the fashion equivalent of a family secret. Dark humor, soft cotton, and just unhinged enough to make your aunt clutch her pearls. Wear it to therapy, baby showers (please don't), or any brunch where trauma is the main course.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eWho is this for? The person who drops deeply unsettling facts about themselves in casual conversation and keeps eating. The one who says \"fun fact about me\" and then makes the whole table go quiet. The friend who turned their weirdest trait into a personality and honestly it works. If you've ever won a \"most disturbing icebreaker\" without trying, congratulations, this is your uniform.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eIt also makes a wildly memorable gift for anyone who appreciates humor that's too specific to be fake.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Milk Sandwich","offers":[{"title":"Black Heather \/ XS","offer_id":49856055509296,"sku":"3650429_9575","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black Heather \/ S","offer_id":49856055542064,"sku":"3650429_8923","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black Heather \/ M","offer_id":49856055574832,"sku":"3650429_8924","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black Heather \/ L","offer_id":49856055607600,"sku":"3650429_8925","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black Heather \/ XL","offer_id":49856055640368,"sku":"3650429_8926","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black Heather \/ 2XL","offer_id":49856055673136,"sku":"3650429_8927","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black Heather \/ 3XL","offer_id":49856055705904,"sku":"3650429_8928","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black Heather \/ 4XL","offer_id":49856055738672,"sku":"3650429_8929","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black Heather \/ 5XL","offer_id":49856055771440,"sku":"3650429_12878","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Maroon \/ XS","offer_id":49856055804208,"sku":"3650429_9545","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Maroon \/ S","offer_id":49856055836976,"sku":"3650429_4106","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Maroon \/ M","offer_id":49856055869744,"sku":"3650429_4107","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Maroon \/ L","offer_id":49856055902512,"sku":"3650429_4108","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Maroon \/ XL","offer_id":49856055935280,"sku":"3650429_4109","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Maroon \/ 2XL","offer_id":49856055968048,"sku":"3650429_4110","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Maroon \/ 3XL","offer_id":49856056000816,"sku":"3650429_15792","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Maroon \/ 4XL","offer_id":49856056033584,"sku":"3650429_15793","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Army \/ S","offer_id":49856056066352,"sku":"3650429_8440","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Army \/ M","offer_id":49856056099120,"sku":"3650429_8441","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Army \/ L","offer_id":49856056131888,"sku":"3650429_8442","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Army \/ XL","offer_id":49856056164656,"sku":"3650429_8443","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Army \/ 2XL","offer_id":49856056197424,"sku":"3650429_8444","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Army \/ 3XL","offer_id":49856056230192,"sku":"3650429_8445","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Army \/ 4XL","offer_id":49856056262960,"sku":"3650429_8446","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Deep Teal \/ S","offer_id":49856056295728,"sku":"3650429_8481","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Deep Teal \/ M","offer_id":49856056328496,"sku":"3650429_8482","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Deep Teal \/ L","offer_id":49856056361264,"sku":"3650429_8483","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Deep Teal \/ XL","offer_id":49856056394032,"sku":"3650429_8484","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Deep Teal \/ 2XL","offer_id":49856056426800,"sku":"3650429_8485","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Deep Teal \/ 3XL","offer_id":49856056459568,"sku":"3650429_8486","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Deep Teal \/ 4XL","offer_id":49856056492336,"sku":"3650429_8487","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Orchid \/ S","offer_id":49856056525104,"sku":"3650429_10352","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Orchid \/ M","offer_id":49856056557872,"sku":"3650429_10353","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Orchid \/ L","offer_id":49856056590640,"sku":"3650429_10354","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Orchid \/ XL","offer_id":49856056623408,"sku":"3650429_10355","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Orchid \/ 2XL","offer_id":49856056656176,"sku":"3650429_10356","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/9570\/5904\/files\/MILK_SANDWICH_I_ABSORBED_MY_TWIN_GREY_BG_MARKETING_IMAGE.png?v=1751500342"},{"product_id":"the-dark-web-is-fun-unisex-t-shirt","title":"The Dark Web Is Fun T-shirt","description":"\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eThe Dark Web Is Fun tee is equal parts unhinged and adorable. Soft enough for a nap, loud enough to scare off LinkedIn people. Perfect for tech bros, conspiracy theorists at brunch, or anyone whose idea of adventure involves sketchy URLs and zero regrets.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eWho is this for? The person who clears their browser history out of principle, not necessity. The one who has opinions about VPNs and won't stop sharing them at dinner. The friend who says \"I'll send you the link\" in a tone that makes you nervous. If you have ever described something perfectly legal as \"off the grid,\" this shirt was designed with you in mind.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eIt also makes a great gift for anyone who thinks incognito mode is a lifestyle and not just a browser setting.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cdiv class=\"table-responsive dynamic\" data-unit-system=\"imperial\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Milk Sandwich","offers":[{"title":"Vintage White \/ S","offer_id":49856064618800,"sku":"6354208_14714","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Vintage White \/ M","offer_id":49856064651568,"sku":"6354208_14715","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Vintage White \/ L","offer_id":49856064684336,"sku":"6354208_14716","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Vintage White \/ XL","offer_id":49856064717104,"sku":"6354208_14717","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Vintage White \/ 2XL","offer_id":49856064749872,"sku":"6354208_14718","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Prism Lilac \/ S","offer_id":49856063701296,"sku":"6354208_9374","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Prism Lilac \/ M","offer_id":49856063734064,"sku":"6354208_9375","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Prism Lilac \/ L","offer_id":49856063766832,"sku":"6354208_9376","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Prism Lilac \/ XL","offer_id":49856063799600,"sku":"6354208_9377","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Prism Lilac \/ 2XL","offer_id":49856063832368,"sku":"6354208_9378","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Prism Lilac \/ 3XL","offer_id":49856063865136,"sku":"6354208_9379","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Prism Lilac \/ 4XL","offer_id":49856063897904,"sku":"6354208_9380","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ocean Blue \/ S","offer_id":49856063930672,"sku":"6354208_4116","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ocean Blue \/ M","offer_id":49856063963440,"sku":"6354208_4117","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ocean Blue \/ L","offer_id":49856063996208,"sku":"6354208_4118","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ocean Blue \/ XL","offer_id":49856064028976,"sku":"6354208_4119","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ocean Blue \/ 2XL","offer_id":49856064061744,"sku":"6354208_4120","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ocean Blue \/ 3XL","offer_id":49856064094512,"sku":"6354208_5302","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ocean Blue \/ 4XL","offer_id":49856064127280,"sku":"6354208_5317","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Mint \/ S","offer_id":49856064160048,"sku":"6354208_8502","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Mint \/ M","offer_id":49856064192816,"sku":"6354208_8503","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Mint \/ L","offer_id":49856064225584,"sku":"6354208_8504","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Mint \/ XL","offer_id":49856064258352,"sku":"6354208_8505","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Mint \/ 2XL","offer_id":49856064291120,"sku":"6354208_8506","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Mint \/ 3XL","offer_id":49856064323888,"sku":"6354208_8507","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Mint \/ 4XL","offer_id":49856064356656,"sku":"6354208_8508","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ash \/ S","offer_id":49856064389424,"sku":"6354208_4026","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ash \/ M","offer_id":49856064422192,"sku":"6354208_4027","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ash \/ L","offer_id":49856064454960,"sku":"6354208_4028","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ash \/ XL","offer_id":49856064487728,"sku":"6354208_4029","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ash \/ 2XL","offer_id":49856064520496,"sku":"6354208_4030","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ash \/ 3XL","offer_id":49856064553264,"sku":"6354208_8447","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ash \/ 4XL","offer_id":49856064586032,"sku":"6354208_8448","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/9570\/5904\/files\/MILK_SANDWICH_DARK_WEB_GREY_BG_MARKETING_IMAGE.png?v=1751500324"},{"product_id":"pretending-im-not-stoned-its-my-superpower-unisex-t-shirt","title":"Pretending I'm Not Stoned T-shirt","description":"\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eThe Pretending I'm Not Stoned tee does the heavy lifting. Soft, smug, and one eyebrow away from an Oscar. It's perfect for brunch with people who say \"networking,\" candy aisles that suddenly feel like escape rooms, and every family gathering. Period.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eWho is this for? The person who rehearses \"I'm just tired\" in the mirror before leaving the house. The one who nods along in meetings with a level of focus that is technically suspicious. The friend who orders a $47 appetizer sampler for the table and calls it \"being generous.\" If you have ever laughed way too hard at something that wasn't that funny and then had to explain yourself, this shirt already belongs to you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eIt also makes a great gift for anyone who treats eye drops like a personality trait and snacks like a competitive sport.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cstrong class=\"size-guide-title\"\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Milk Sandwich","offers":[{"title":"Black Heather \/ XS","offer_id":49856097386800,"sku":"8827015_9575","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black Heather \/ S","offer_id":49856097419568,"sku":"8827015_8923","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black Heather \/ M","offer_id":49856097452336,"sku":"8827015_8924","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black Heather \/ L","offer_id":49856097485104,"sku":"8827015_8925","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black Heather \/ XL","offer_id":49856097517872,"sku":"8827015_8926","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black Heather \/ 2XL","offer_id":49856097550640,"sku":"8827015_8927","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black Heather \/ 3XL","offer_id":49856097583408,"sku":"8827015_8928","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Midnight Navy \/ XS","offer_id":49856097616176,"sku":"8827015_9569","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Midnight Navy \/ S","offer_id":49856097648944,"sku":"8827015_8495","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Midnight Navy \/ M","offer_id":49856097681712,"sku":"8827015_8496","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Midnight Navy \/ L","offer_id":49856097714480,"sku":"8827015_8497","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Midnight Navy \/ XL","offer_id":49856097747248,"sku":"8827015_8498","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Midnight Navy \/ 2XL","offer_id":49856097780016,"sku":"8827015_8499","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Midnight Navy \/ 3XL","offer_id":49856097812784,"sku":"8827015_8500","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Army \/ S","offer_id":49856097845552,"sku":"8827015_8440","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Army \/ M","offer_id":49856097878320,"sku":"8827015_8441","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Army \/ L","offer_id":49856097911088,"sku":"8827015_8442","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Army \/ XL","offer_id":49856097943856,"sku":"8827015_8443","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Army \/ 2XL","offer_id":49856097976624,"sku":"8827015_8444","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Army \/ 3XL","offer_id":49856098009392,"sku":"8827015_8445","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Deep Teal \/ S","offer_id":49856098042160,"sku":"8827015_8481","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Deep Teal \/ M","offer_id":49856098074928,"sku":"8827015_8482","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Deep Teal \/ L","offer_id":49856098107696,"sku":"8827015_8483","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Deep Teal \/ XL","offer_id":49856098140464,"sku":"8827015_8484","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Deep Teal \/ 2XL","offer_id":49856098173232,"sku":"8827015_8485","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Deep Teal \/ 3XL","offer_id":49856098206000,"sku":"8827015_8486","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Mauve \/ S","offer_id":49856098238768,"sku":"8827015_9395","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Mauve \/ M","offer_id":49856098271536,"sku":"8827015_9396","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Mauve \/ L","offer_id":49856098304304,"sku":"8827015_9397","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Mauve \/ XL","offer_id":49856098337072,"sku":"8827015_9398","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Mauve \/ 2XL","offer_id":49856098369840,"sku":"8827015_9399","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Mauve \/ 3XL","offer_id":49856098402608,"sku":"8827015_9400","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/9570\/5904\/files\/MILK_SANDWICH_PRETENDING_IM_NOT_STONED_GREY_BG_MARKETING_IMAGE.png?v=1751500262"},{"product_id":"ignore-my-redflags-unisex-t-shirt","title":"Ignore My Redflags T-shirt","description":"\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eRed flags? Consider them seasonal decor. The Ignore My Redflags t-shirt from Milk Sandwich is soft enough to sleep in but loud enough to announce poor decisions from across the room. Ideal for brunch meltdowns, first dates that definitely shouldn't be second dates, or family functions where honesty feels off-brand.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eWho is this for? The friend who screenshots their own texts and sends them to the group chat for validation. The person who knows exactly what they're doing and has chosen chaos anyway. The one who says \"I'm a lot\" like it's a resume bullet point. Also a perfect gift for anyone who treats self-awareness as a personality trait but not a course of action.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Milk Sandwich","offers":[{"title":"Black Heather \/ XS","offer_id":49856101089584,"sku":"1113350_9575","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black Heather \/ S","offer_id":49856101122352,"sku":"1113350_8923","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black Heather \/ M","offer_id":49856101155120,"sku":"1113350_8924","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black Heather \/ L","offer_id":49856101187888,"sku":"1113350_8925","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black Heather \/ XL","offer_id":49856101220656,"sku":"1113350_8926","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black Heather \/ 2XL","offer_id":49856101253424,"sku":"1113350_8927","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black Heather \/ 3XL","offer_id":49856101286192,"sku":"1113350_8928","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Midnight Navy \/ XS","offer_id":49856101318960,"sku":"1113350_9569","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Midnight Navy \/ S","offer_id":49856101351728,"sku":"1113350_8495","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Midnight Navy \/ M","offer_id":49856101384496,"sku":"1113350_8496","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Midnight Navy \/ L","offer_id":49856101417264,"sku":"1113350_8497","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Midnight Navy \/ XL","offer_id":49856101450032,"sku":"1113350_8498","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Midnight Navy \/ 2XL","offer_id":49856101482800,"sku":"1113350_8499","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Midnight Navy \/ 3XL","offer_id":49856101515568,"sku":"1113350_8500","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Maroon \/ XS","offer_id":49856101548336,"sku":"1113350_9545","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Maroon \/ S","offer_id":49856101581104,"sku":"1113350_4106","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Maroon \/ M","offer_id":49856101613872,"sku":"1113350_4107","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Maroon \/ L","offer_id":49856101646640,"sku":"1113350_4108","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Maroon \/ XL","offer_id":49856101679408,"sku":"1113350_4109","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Maroon \/ 2XL","offer_id":49856101712176,"sku":"1113350_4110","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Maroon \/ 3XL","offer_id":49856101744944,"sku":"1113350_15792","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Asphalt \/ S","offer_id":49856101777712,"sku":"1113350_4031","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Asphalt \/ M","offer_id":49856101810480,"sku":"1113350_4032","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Asphalt \/ L","offer_id":49856101843248,"sku":"1113350_4033","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Asphalt \/ XL","offer_id":49856101876016,"sku":"1113350_4034","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Asphalt \/ 2XL","offer_id":49856101908784,"sku":"1113350_4035","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Asphalt \/ 3XL","offer_id":49856101941552,"sku":"1113350_5297","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Olive \/ S","offer_id":49856101974320,"sku":"1113350_4121","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Olive \/ M","offer_id":49856102007088,"sku":"1113350_4122","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Olive \/ L","offer_id":49856102039856,"sku":"1113350_4123","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Olive \/ XL","offer_id":49856102072624,"sku":"1113350_4124","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Olive \/ 2XL","offer_id":49856102105392,"sku":"1113350_4125","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Olive \/ 3XL","offer_id":49856102138160,"sku":"1113350_16340","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/9570\/5904\/files\/MILK_SANDWICH_IGNORE_MY_REDFLAGS_GREY_BG_MARKETING_IMAGE.png?v=1751500218"},{"product_id":"triggered-unisex-t-shirt","title":"Triggered T-shirt","description":"\u003cp data-stage=\"spotlight\" data-intent=\"product-scene\" data-evidence=\"ms-original-design\"\u003e\u003cdfn id=\"triggered\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eTriggered\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/dfn\u003e is an \u003cstrong\u003eoriginal Milk Sandwich graphic tee\u003c\/strong\u003e for \u003cmark\u003ethe person who describes their entire emotional state before 9 AM in one word\u003c\/mark\u003e.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp data-stage=\"tension\"\u003eThe word your group chat uses seventeen times a day. The word your coworker whispers under their breath during the all-hands. The word that's been living rent-free in your chest since the parking lot meeting that could have been an email.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp data-stage=\"alleviate\"\u003eNot a novelty print. Not a joke shirt. \u003cem\u003eTriggered\u003c\/em\u003e is stacked, repeated, and unapologetic. Because you don't just get triggered once. It happens in layers.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp data-stage=\"ground\"\u003e\u003cdata value=\"30.00\"\u003e$30\u003c\/data\u003e. Soft unisex tri-blend. Printed on demand. Original Milk Sandwich design. No stock art. Ships 3-7 business days. 30-day claim window.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp data-stage=\"engage\"\u003eIf you've ever said \"I cannot,\" while very much continuing to can, this one's yours.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Milk Sandwich","offers":[{"title":"Silver \/ S","offer_id":49894283804976,"sku":"9756274_4146","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Silver \/ M","offer_id":49894283837744,"sku":"9756274_4147","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Silver \/ L","offer_id":49894283870512,"sku":"9756274_4148","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Silver \/ XL","offer_id":49894283903280,"sku":"9756274_4149","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Silver \/ 2XL","offer_id":49894283936048,"sku":"9756274_4150","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XS","offer_id":49894283968816,"sku":"9756274_9526","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":49894284001584,"sku":"9756274_4011","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":49894284034352,"sku":"9756274_4012","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":49894284067120,"sku":"9756274_4013","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":49894284099888,"sku":"9756274_4014","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":49894284132656,"sku":"9756274_4015","price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/9570\/5904\/files\/MILK_SANDWICH_TRIGGERED_MARKETING_IMAGE_GREY_BG.png?v=1751500167"}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/9570\/5904\/collections\/SNARK.png?v=1748650962","url":"https:\/\/milksandwich.com\/collections\/low-stakes-chaos.oembed?page=2","provider":"Milk Sandwich","version":"1.0","type":"link"}